I don’t remember much about childhood. At most, just the faint smell of sanitary alcohol in a small white room and needle pricked now and then. Pitying eyes from relatives, and my parents and twin younger brothers worried looks.

I was born in the province of a middle-class family. My father, Leon Lee, was a mechanical engineer. And my mother, Lean Lee, was a high school graduate. Both were working in our small grocery store.

I’m the eldest daughter of the family, Leanna Lee.

I have an adorable pair of younger brothers –– the eldest by a minute, Lawrence Lee, and the youngest, Lance Lee. I was four years older than them.

When I was seven, an unexpected event transpired in our family that changed our lives forever. Our small grocery store closed down, and my mother accumulated millions worth of debt and was in hiding inside our house –– never to walk out from the streets.

My father was furious, and they would quarrel each day. I was still a child at that time and was indifferent to their sufferings.

From then on, I sold my mother’s baked macarons and peanuts at school to get us by in our everyday life while my father immersed himself in building a rice mill in our little warehouse until dark.

Thankfully, we still have our little house. Although we didn’t have electricity (because we couldn’t afford it), we still have water.

My father was a proud, strict man, but for us to live a little comfortable, he asked our neighbor if we could tap into their electricity. Fortunately, they took pity and agreed.

Over time, my level of maturity increased and gradually understood our predicament. My mother said that it was due to the economic crisis that we closed shop. But sometimes, I think our money depleted because of me –– my frequent visit to the hospital and those expensive medicines I consumed.

Thinking about it, I felt guilty towards my parents and twin younger brothers.

After almost three years of poverty, my father finished constructing his rice mill, and we started a business of Buy and Sell of rice and dried coconuts. Inch by inch, we got back on our feet and paid off my mother’s debt.

I discovered two things from that experience.

One, I want a capable man like my father. That answers the question as to why I was still single even at forty.

Two, it’s all about the money.